Interesting observation

Yesterday I revised my book, The Untold Story of Margaret Hearst alias Maugrim Valletta. Before I did that, my book had been #25 in the Kindle Western category. After six hours of being under ‘review’ my book was re-published and had dropped in ranking to #36. This morning I checked and it’s at #45. Interesting. I was surprised that my book was on the list at all, especially because it’s only got one review. The Night I Walked off of Boot Hill isn’t even on the top 100 list and I’ve got five reviews on it and it has sold better than Margaret Hearst.

Okay, that being said, I have added some more to my short western romance, The Untold Story of Margaret Hearst, alias Maugrim Valletta

If you’re curious what this book is about, here’s the teaser: Daughter of one of the wealthiest men in the county, sophisticated Miss Margaret Hearst meets a young thief who steals her heart. Her parents forbid Margaret to ever see the boy again, but she runs away with him. Unbeknownst to Margaret, she is being followed by a man she’s known all her life: LJ Steffen. LJ loves Margaret and fears for her safety; he is determined to win Margaret’s heart. And one day, Margaret’s boyfriend casts her out of his life and she nearly dies, will LJ arrive in time to save her? And if he does, will Margaret finally love him back, even though she’s disregarded his feelings for her for the past several years?

And here’s the review of this book:
First, I did find many of the characters to be rather unlikeable, but I think that was the point. LJ was the most likeable even though he came off a little spineless, but again I think that was the point of him. Margaret definitely struck me as a character who lived a sheltered life because she doesn’t think things through and is truly her own worst enemy. Her inner thoughts can be rather childish for a twenty-year-old, which I think comes from her sheltered background. Overall, I think the characters are very clear and work well to carry the story along.
My big criticism for this story is that there is so much potential here. I mean, there was a lot that was hinted at that could have been used to make this a bigger, wilder romantic adventure. I would have liked to see more of a build-up to the Matthew/Margaret romance and more behind LJ. I think the author could get a longer, deeper, more enjoyable story if she extended some of the events. For .99 cents, it’s worth it to see how talented the author is at weaving a story, but I really felt like she was holding herself back or rushing out of excitement. So, hopefully one day I come back here to find that this e-book has grown bigger and deeper.


11 thoughts on “Interesting observation

  1. Never realized that the review took the book off the site. Good to know. My book is dropping too at a pretty big click, so it could also be the season. Summer is not an indie author’s best friend.

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